Today we’re answering a question about something that is close to our heart: “Do I need a wedding planner?”
Yes my friends- you NEED a wedding planner, you DESERVE a wedding planner, and you should have a wedding planner. Every engaged couple NEEDS a wedding planner. Planning a wedding is stressful, and no one should have to have any additional amount of stress than what they already have!
Before getting into any of the details, let’s talk about something… wedding planners aren’t just for daddy’s little girls, movie stars, and debutantes (no offense to any of those ladies) anymore! Forget what you see in the movies and on TV. That’s not real life. You planning your wedding and wanting to just elope because it’s so stressful? THAT is real life- and you can do something about it.
Over the past few years, I’ve heard lots of reasons why couples think they can’t have or don’t need a wedding planner. And honestly, most of these reasons are just excuses that couples tell themselves so they feel better about not having a wedding planner. So for today, let’s discuss these “reasons” for not having a planner that I hear so very often…
“I’m on a tight budget.”
Everyone is on a budget when planning a wedding. And most everyone is on a tight budget at that! But you know what? If you have a wedding planner, he or she will be able to HELP you with that budget. They will tell you what you need and what you don’t need (e.g. that you don’t have to waste money on X, Y, or Z). They might even be able to pull a few strings here or there (not saying they WILL, but it does help to know someone).
And you know what else? When it comes to cost and selection, there are LOTS of planners out there. I’m sure you can find one that fits within your budget (just make sure you like them too- that’s a whole other post though!). If you need to make it work – cut out 20 guests, don’t get such an expensive wedding dress, or forget expensive wedding gifts. I promise that it will be the BEST money you spend. And one other thing (speaking as a wedding planner now)… I can’t even count how many times we’ve saved couples money. Just saying.
“I am able to plan my own wedding and I know what I want.”
Heck yes, of course you want to plan your own wedding- so do it! But you want the FUN parts of planning your wedding, not the stressful/annoying/crazy parts. Like finding out pricing for rentals, waiting for vendors to respond to you, figuring out your wedding day timeline, or receiving deliveries and overseeing setup.
If you have a wedding planner, you WILL still be planning your wedding. You WILL still have control over what happens for your wedding. It will just be you planning your wedding with more guidance, knowledge, and a directed focus. And on the day of… oh my goodness, you’ll be able to just ENJOY your wedding, let go of everything and enjoy your day!
“I have a specific vision for my wedding and I don’t want to trust anyone else to execute it.”
Having a specific vision is all the more reason to have a planner! I promise you, if you have a planner that you connect with, he or she is going to understand what you are envisioning for your wedding. More so than anyone else, because they will know how to successfully make it happen for you. As far as having your vision reflect YOU, you would actually be surprised at how hard planners work to get to know you and make this a reality. If you hire the right planners, they WILL NOT force their own wants upon you – they want it to be YOUR wedding, not theirs or someone else’s!
“I want to design/craft/DIY with my sister/friends/mother, grandmother while planning my wedding.”
Having a wedding planner will not take the joy and fun out of doing wedding-related tasks and projects with your family and friends. If that’s what you want, do it. Your planner will probably have suggestions or tips for whatever you’re doing! You can still design your whole wedding with your sister (which we are sure that she is great in planning and have lots of ideas herself), or craft with your best friend, or bake cakes with your grandmother. You can absolutely have a planner even if you want other people to be involved with your wedding.
“My sister/friend/cousin just got married and she is going to plan my wedding.”
“My sister/friend/cousin/mom/aunt has done other weddings and is going to plan my wedding.”
Okay, so this can only apply if your sister/friend/cousin/aunt/mom IS a wedding planner. [And mind you, if they are, they’ll probably make you hire someone for the day of the wedding so they can enjoy it- in fact my friends have already insisted that I NOT work at their weddings.] So other than that situation, you want to be able to ENJOY your planning experience with your family members. You don’t want to butt heads with your mom or hate your sister/friend by the end of the planning process. In the case of someone who has recently gotten married wanting to help you, sure, you can take their suggestions on what vendors they used for their own wedding, but that’s really as far as you need to go. Plus, wouldn’t it be better to have fun with them during your wedding planning instead of stressing them (and yourself) out?
And then there’s the DAY OF the wedding. You want your sister/friend/cousin/aunt/mother to ENJOY your wedding, right?! I guarantee you they want to enjoy it too! And you don’t want them spending the day of your wedding (or the day before for that matter) scanning things all around your venue, overseeing setup, calling vendors, dealing with messes, etc etc. It’s hard work friends… you don’t want to wish that on any of the people you love.
“My venue has a planner.”
So here’s the thing- most ALL venues have coordinators, but they ARE NOT wedding planners. The truth is that they’re there for the venue! They are there to handle logistical matters for the venue, therefore needing to have a relationship with you. Their concern is the venue, as it should be, since it pays their paycheck. When it comes to actually planning you wedding? The only thing they’re going to do is handle things having to do with the venue (like what appetizers you want served at cocktail hour, or when you want dinner to start). They won’t make appointments for you, help you design your wedding, assist you in choosing your stationery, or create a timeline for your whole wedding day.
“I really really can’t afford a wedding planner.”
Okay, well if you’ve weighted the options and you really can’t afford to have a wedding planner help you with the full planning of your wedding, there are alternatives! Many planners have smaller packages available- “partial” planning so to speak. This is always a great option if you’ve already found your venue but need help with vendors and logistics OR design, etc. Can’t afford that? Move on to another option… “Month Of” planning (known as Day-Of Coordination, although this wording does not apply to the reality because no one can walk into a wedding on the day and know what’s going on). This will at least ensure that you have all your ducks in a row for the wedding day. You will have help in creating your wedding day timeline, confirming your vendors, and most of all, handling everything on the day of the wedding! So if you can’t spring for a full wedding planner, at least have a wedding coordinator!
Oh and one more thing, with you working hard at your fabulous job (that am sure you have), why on Earth you want to add Another FULL TIME job to your workload? There is a reason that wedding planners exist. Wedding planning takes a lot of time, so why not leave it to someone who knows what they are doing – and whose job is already is?
I know the biggest thing that it comes down to when deciding whether or not you need a planner is money. Yep, everyone is on a budget, we know that. But the thing is, a planner might not be as much as you think they are comparing to the whole wedding budget. it won’t hurt anyone to look around and inquire with planners about what their packages and costs are.
After all , a wedding planner’s goal is to help YOU plan your wedding and make your life easier.